Waiting

Lately I've noticed that I'm not a very patient person. It's not that patience is a recent struggle, just a recent conviction. Waiting has never been my forte.

So this morning I decided to find a verse in the Psalms about waiting on the Lord and reflect on it. And I found this in Psalm 37:34: "Wait for the Lord, and keep his way."

Now, as I started reflecting I was just thinking about wanting to learn to be patient for things I want to happen in my life. I wanted to think about waiting on God's timing for those things.

But God showed me something as I thought about that verse. He showed me that waiting for him doesn't mean setting my eyes on what I want and waiting for him to give it to me. It means just looking to him and seeing what he will do in my life. And keeping his way as I wait. Without my hidden agenda. Otherwise I'm not really waiting for him; I'm waiting for whatever is on my list.

And I realized something else, too. There have been times in my life when I've been waiting on God's timing for my agenda and what he ends up giving me isn't my agenda at all. It's something much better than what I thought of. If God isn't planning what I hope for, it's because he's planning something that's ultimately so much better.

Do I have it all figured out? Not remotely. Somehow I still have to figure out to let go of the agenda I cling so tightly to, to truly give it to God and wait for him, not for him to give me what I want.

Dreams Come True

In college I drove a white 1992 LeBaron. It was a total grandma car. And the hood latch was broken, so if I had to open the hood to check my oil I either needed a friend to hold the latch while I pulled the lever, or I needed to get the long stick out of my trunk, prop it just right under the latch, then pull the lever. I looked cool.

During my internship, the father of the family I was living with asked me: "What's your dream car?"

Without even pausing I said, "A '92 LeBaron."

OK, so I was kinda kidding. But kind of not. It had been a blessing that I'd gotten a car to drive out to Wisconsin for my internship, and I was thankful I had it.

I'd like to have that kind of attitude about everything God has given me. Rather than dreaming of what could be, I'd like to consider each blessing from God a dream come true. My dream home? A cheap town home to rent. (Truly though, I think my town home is great!)

I think constantly dreaming about bigger and better things leads to a life of discontent. You never have enough. But if you consider what you have to be a dream come true, whether it's a '92 LeBaron with a broken hood latch or not, you'll be happier.