Grace

I’ve always been a big fan of grace. Back when I thought I wanted kids, that was my girl’s name of choice.

I guess it’s because I need so much of it, and yet have such a hard time giving it to myself.

I’m a very goal-oriented person with a lot of lists and spreadsheets and plans. And lately I’ve learned to give myself a little grace in some of those areas. I like my house clean, but the world won’t end if I don’t vacuum one week. Especially if my floors don’t even look messy. And who cares if I don’t read as many books as I wanted to this year? If I stress myself out trying to do it—what have I really accomplished? Or, when my page-a-day puzzle calendar puzzle is more stressful than fun...who cares if I cheat a little? The point is that it's supposed to be fun.

The pendulum can swing too far—where you let things keep sliding and have no goals. I don’t think that’s a big risk for me, but I’m watchful of it. But if you’re feeling stressed about the long to-do list ahead of you—see which things you can cut out this week. Give yourself some grace.

Healthy Choices

If you thought this blog was going to be about healthy food choices—hi, my name is Ali, and I am a carbivore. Now that that’s out of the way…

Over the last year or so, I’ve done a lot of self-discovering. One thing I’ve realized is that I’m a lot more introverted than I ever realized. And I’ve learned things I need to do—or not do—to respect who I am. I’ve realized it’s okay to say no to something you really don’t want to do.

For example, I’ve been invited to a few parties by people I barely knew—at which the person I barely knew would be the only person I knew at all. There was a time when I would’ve thought, “I should go. It will be good for me to stretch myself.” But I realized that’s only a good reason to do something if there’s a compelling reason to be stretched. So I said no to those parties, knowing they would exhaust me and I would feel awkward the whole time.

I’ve also had to re-evaluate some of my ministry commitments in light of what was best for me. I had to back down from some things to pursue new callings. And even though in many ways the new callings are going to be harder and more outside of my comfort zone, they’re much better for my emotional health. I’ve learned I can make choices about how to serve in an emotionally healthy way.

I’ve had to unfriend or hide people on Facebook in order to take care of myself. I’ve seen firsthand how much better I feel when I exercise daily and sleep on a regular schedule. (Though somehow, I manage to make excuses about the exercise thing…) I’ve learned that speed-reading through the Bible in a year leaves me empty and dry, but super-slow reading through 8 chapters in a year and really meditating on them makes me sense God’s presence more and more.

I’m not saying this to advocate making selfish decisions. My point is simply that it’s important to know who you are and making godly decisions in light of that. That doesn’t mean that if you hate action movies, you should always say no to watching them with your significant other, who loves them. But it might mean that if action movies replay in your head and fill you with fears, you find ways to cope with that.

And if it’s a decision that really has no bearing on anyone else, and it’s not a matter of choosing to sin—do whatever you want. Don’t go to the party. Read the Bible the way that means the most to you.

Because if you don’t take care of yourself, you’ll burn out pretty soon trying to take care of others.